Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

With a Faint Tinge Of Ben Af­fleck

Fe­male au­di­ence mem­ber: Mr. Col­bert, have you been fuck­ing Matt Da­mon?
Stephen Col­bert: Why? Did his dick taste like me?

–Stu­dio, The Col­bert Re­port

Over­heard by: Cyn­thia

Ink­ing Is Over­rat­ed

Drew Bar­ry­more: I wish I was an oc­to­pus so I could hug ten peo­ple at a time!


Over­heard by: You mean a squid?

Way to Clear That Up

Dan Quayle: It is­n’t pol­lu­tion that is hurt­ing the en­vi­ron­ment, it’s the im­pu­ri­ties in our air and wa­ter that are do­ing it.

Why I Got Kicked Out of Preschool

In­ter­view­er: Why did you choose to star in the soft porn cult clas­sic Caligu­la, in which you danced in a cone bra?
He­len Mir­ren: It was an ir­re­sistible mix of art and gen­i­tals.


And Ladies Sec­ond

P. Did­dy on for­mal ri­val Snoop Dogg: We ain’t no gang­sters. We are men first.


Is Any­one Sur­prised?

Brit­ney Spears: I per­formed at Mom and Dad’s par­ty when I was four. Oh my gosh, I was singing a Madon­na song, and I peed my­self.

Over­heard by: lick­etys­plit

Per­ish the Thought!

San­jaya Malakar, on why he was vot­ed off Amer­i­can Idol: Hon­est­ly, I’m not a coun­try singer.


Over­heard by: e