Victoria Beckham: I’m proud I still have a really good sex life with David. He is very much in proportion. He does have a huge one, though. He does. You can see it in the advert. It is all his. It is like a tractor exhaust pipe!
–www.perezhilton.com
Overheard by: Melissa
Patti LaBelle, to Jennifer Hudson: I didn’t know you were this nice. I thought you were a bitch.
–http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/bwiddicombe/2007/03/28/2007-03-28_anna_nicoles_unlikely_pitch.html
Starstruck dude: You’re Jon Lovitz!
Jon Lovitz: Jealous?
–Greenwich Village
Mark Wahlberg: When my daughter is 10 and 11, and especially in the teenage years, I want to be there with a gun. It’s not mess-around time.
–http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/r_m/index.html
Quentin Tarantino: I’ve always had a thought maybe that I might have been Shakespeare in another life. I don’t really believe that 100%, and I don’t really care about Shakespeare, I’ve never been into Shakespeare, but then people are constantly bringing up all of these qualities in my work that mirror Shakespearean tragedies and moments and themes.
–GQ
Female audience member: Mr. Colbert, have you been fucking Matt Damon?
Stephen Colbert: Why? Did his dick taste like me?
–Studio, The Colbert Report
Overheard by: Cynthia
Cameron Diaz: I’ve been noticing gravity since I was very young.
Drew Barrymore: I wish I was an octopus so I could hug ten people at a time!
–http://thinkexist.com/quotation/oh-i_love_hugging-i_wish_i_was_an_octopus-so_i/203717.html
Overheard by: You mean a squid?
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Dan Quayle: It isn’t pollution that is hurting the environment, it’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.