Christina Aguilera: I’m an ocean, because I’m really deep. If you search deep enough you can find rare exotic treasures.
Overheard by: oh-hay-hay
Archive for 2022
What Have You Done for Jesus Lately?
Bridget Moynahan, on meeting the pope: I went up there and I just went blank, so I bent down, licked his hand, and went off.
Our Odiferous Emissions Are Frying Us Like Bacon
PETA on global warming: The most powerful step that we can take as individuals to avert global warming is to stop eating meat, eggs, and dairy products.
–http://goveg.com/environment-globalwarming.asp
… Using Penises and Vaginas
Paris Hilton: People think I sleep with everyone, but it’s not like that — kissing is all I do.
–In Touch Weekly
Overheard by: rome-dawg
Dialysis and a Head-hunt?
R. Kelly: All of a sudden you’re like the bin Laden of America. Osama bin Laden is the only one who knows exactly what I’m going through.
–vh1.com
Clinton and Gonzales: Good One!
Former NYC mayor David Dinkins: I haven’t committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law.
Overheard by: literariesdonotrun
… And That’s Why My Family Hates Me
Natalie Portman: When I was seven years old, I put on shows for everyone at my grandpa’s funeral. I was always the little entertainer.
Overheard by: buttpaste queen
The Gift Was Silence
Fergie: I, uh, I had a conversation with God, basically. I don’t know how to interpret this, but He said, ‘I’ve given you this beautiful gift, and you’re throwing it away.’
Overheard by: chai tea is love
Eternal Cooties Carry Twice the Bite
Justin Timberlake: I kiss people with my soul. I don’t kiss them with my mouth.
Overheard by: ghosthumpersanon
Stop! In the Name Of Grammar
Diana Ross: You must pronunciate everything.
–American Idol
