Joaquin phoenix: Do I have a large frog in my hair? Something’s crawling out of my scalp. No, but I mean I feel it. I’m not worried about the looks, I’m worried about the sensation of my brain being eaten.

Overheard by: krabby patty

Heather Mills: There are many other kinds of milk available. Why don’t we try drinking rats’ milk and dogs’ milk?


Starstruck dude: You’re Jon Lovitz!
Jon Lovitz: Jealous?

–Greenwich Village

Tea Leoni: I’m getting a penis in early spring, so that will be interesting.


Lindsay Lohan: I think I am my mom. We’re so similar, she even looks like me.

–In Touch Magazine

Halle Berry: There is nothing bad about it. The morning sickness and the vomiting and the hot sweats — nothing’s been bad about it. I’ve loved every second of it.


Overheard by: srsly?

Pamela Anderson: I don’t think about anything too much… If I think too much, it kind of freaks me out!

Overheard by: the big V

Jake Gyllenhaal: Sometimes what I actually love to do is go to a farm and get fresh milk or watch a pig get slaughtered.

Overheard by: piggy bank pimp

Tara Reid: I like when a guy makes me feel like a woman and a little girl at the same time.

Overheard by: seamonkeybabydaddy

Alicia Silverstone: I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it’s true lightness.