Lindsay Lohan: I was going out with someone and they said I should read Machiavelli and I was like, ‘Nah,’ and then I was like, ‘Okay, I’ll read it,’ and now it is always with me.

Overheard by: bloody hell

Larry Birkhead, about a pregnant Anna Nicole Smith when he asked if there was a chance the baby might be another man’s: She smacked me and said, ‘I’m not a whore, you dummy!’.


Paris Hilton, in China for Turkey Day: Shanghai looks like the future!


Overheard by: ana plz

Tori Spelling: Why bull sperm? Can’t it be horse sperm, or cow sperm?

Overheard by: bbb

Naomi Campbell: I look at [modeling] as something I’m doing for black people in general.


Cher: I’ve been up and down so many times that I feel as if I’m in a revolving door.

Overheard by: DiggityDawg

Jessica Simpson: My father was a minister, so growing up we’d go on a missionary trip every summer. The first time I went to that orphanage I was 16. I remember holding this baby who was found in a dumpster. I wanted to adopt him right then and there. I was like, ‘Dad, can I have him for my birthday, please?!’

Overheard by: rrrrrruffles

Christina Aguilera: I think everybody should have a great Wonderbra.

Overheard by: Anya

George W. Bush: Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.


Arnold Schwarzenegger, on working out: It is as satisfying to me as cumming is. You know — as having sex with a woman and cumming. So can you believe how much I am in heaven? I am, like, getting the feeling of cumming in the gym, I’m getting the feeling of cumming at home, I’m getting the feeling of cumming backstage when I pump up. When I pose out in front of five thousand people, I get the same feeling, so I am cumming day and night.